She wanted to sell me a whole bedroom set, but I just wanted one nightstand.
Met a girl in the pub last night who said she'd show me a good time... Got outside, she ran 100m in 9.72 seconds...
I can't believe you were the sperm that won the race, and you are still slow.
I'm hosting a charity event for people who struggle to reach orgasms. If you can't come, let me know.