Jonno Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 I'm not saying she's a whore, but she does give away more pussy than an animal shelter. I'm not saying she's a slut, but I'm pretty sure I saw her vagina on Dirty Jobs. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 16 Author Share Posted February 16 I'm not saying I hate you. All I'm saying is if you got hit by a bus, I'd be driving that bus. I'm not saying I live in a bad area. But the biggest car park near me I'd outside the Crown Court. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 16 Author Share Posted February 16 I'm not saying she's a bad driver. But when she drives her sat nav doesn't speak, it prays in Latin. I'm not saying the staff in my local supermarket are thick. But when I asked if they could open Till 2, the manager replied, "We're already open till 10 most nights. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 16 Author Share Posted February 16 I'm not saying my ex is fat. But my memory foam mattress took a year to forget her. I'm not saying the women in my local pub are ugly. But there's a paper bag machine in the gents. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 16 Author Share Posted February 16 I'm not saying that Flat Earthers, Anti-Vaxxers, and Creationists are unintelligent people. But there is a reason why shoes with Velcro straps come in adult sizes. 🤣 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 17 Author Share Posted February 17 I'm not saying I'm attractive. But everytime I go into the bathroom and take my clothes off I turn the shower on. I'm not saying Asians are bad drivers. But I'm beginning to think that Pearl Harbour was an accident. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 17 Author Share Posted February 17 I'm not saying I hated my late wife. But after she died in a car crash, I kept in touch with the lamppost. I'm not saying I value sandwiches more than equality. But my favourite part about LGBT is the BLT bit. 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 19 Author Share Posted February 19 I'm not saying Hitler was a good guy. But he really saved the History channel. I'm not saying my wife's a snob. But even her colostomy bag is Louis Vuitton. I'm not saying I have a big dick. But I can do a three legged race by myself. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 24 Author Share Posted February 24 I'm not saying you're stupid. But perhaps you should pursue activities that don't require any form of intellect... like colouring. I'm not saying she's a whore. But if dicks had wings, her mouth would be an airport. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 24 Author Share Posted February 24 My not saying my girlfriend has bad breath. But during blow jobs, my penis is the one gagging. I'm not saying i got too excited when I kissed that saxophone player. But I jazzed in my pants. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 25 Author Share Posted February 25 I'm not saying she's ugly. But would rather pleasure myself with a cheese grater. I'm not saying she's ugly. But if I had to list the top 5 ugliest people. She'd be 1-3. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonno Posted February 25 Author Share Posted February 25 I'm not saying she's easy. But she's been laid on more kitchen floors than lino. I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat. But when she hung out her panties to dry. We lost an hour of daylight. I'm not saying my friends mum is fat. But I swerved to miss her and ran out of fuel. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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