KarenKraft

Picture a serene man, his eyes closed in quiet supination. He's in a beautiful rosewood or mahogany piece with padded sateen all around, and the lovely smell of carnations fill the air.....

Yuk yuk, muk-tuk Aubrey dies and finds himself in front of St Peter at the gates of heaven. "Hey, what's going on here? Where am I?" he asks St Peter. "Welcome to the afterlife," St Peter replies. "No, no this isn't right. I want to speak to the prophet Mohammed, right away." "Would you like a cappuccino?" asks St Peter. "No! I want to speak to the prophet Mohammed," replies Aubrey. "Well, you can talk to Jesus if you want," says St Peter, and goes off to find him. "Jesus, I don't understand what's going on here," Aubrey says. "I want to speak to the prophet Mohammed." "Would you like a cappuccino?" "No, I want to speak to the prophet! Now." "Well, you can talk to God if you like", says Jesus. This appears to be acceptable to Aubrey and off they go. Jesus lets Aubrey into a big room and leaves him. After a few moments there is a puff of smoke and God appears. "Yes, what seems to be the problem here?" booms God. Aubrey is very worked up by now. "Look, I don't get what's happened here, I want to talk to the prophet Mohammed!" "Would you like a cappuccino?" "Okay, okay," says Aubrey, "I'll have a fucking cappuccino - now will someone please let me speak to the prophet Mohammed." "Two cappuccinos, Mohammed," says God.

<< blush >> Thank you, guys.

Sigh. I dunno, Mr. Foamy. Nothing really gets me riled up. I'm sort of a laid back kinda girl. Not easy, mind you, but easy going. I don't have much in the way of political opinions. Honestly, it's just too confusing to watch the news and try to decide what is important and what isn't important. Or not. See, my mind is in perfect balance 100% of the time. Being soft-spoken by nature, demure in all situations, I prefer a quite, understated approach to things, rather than the squirrelly upheaval that seems to trouble others here. I think their anger and frustration can be traced back to the consumption of flesh. Yes, humans were designed to eat kale and lingonberries, not the muscle tissue of other animals! Even though they are dead when y'all eat them, the anger, grief, pain, and disgust lingers in the muscle and connective tissues you eat. It poisons your Karma and, as we all know, that's fucked. Also, I think many of the disturbed persons here need to work on their breathing. It's much more than just in and out. In and out can accomplish many things, but typing calm, introspective, and judiciously tempered messages here is not one, alas. I also suspect that some people here are being affected negatively by chemtrails. We all know that the Masons and the Jews have conspired to create global warming through the use of psychotropic drugs dispersed in chemtrails -- disguised as ordinary condensation vapor trails, of course, which makes every man, woman, and goat fart a bit more than usual. That, in turn, puts more and more methane into the atmos. There is so much chemtrail fart pollution already that it is impossible to find even a single penguin anywhere near the arctic circle. If only Al Gore (who won that election by the way) were president, we wouldn't be in the pickle we're in today. But, as I said, I always maintain both dignity and inner harmony, especially here. Have a super sparkly day!

I'm sorry,tb I was just trying to be punny.

Thank you. I hope I'm not stirring the fat in the fire too much. Meanwhile: I have been trying to join and to make a financial contribution for about a week now. I tried through PayPal but the Admin said it was negative function. I have no idea what this square whatever is about. There's no place to just send a check or something, right?

I'm not almost always wrong? You mean I was wrong about that? Anyway, as a Christian, I believe in the Zionist goal and spirit to guarantee two things: first, that Jews continue to have a homeland that is their own; and second, that so long as the Jews run the place, Muslims, Jews, Christians, and Atheists can all come and enjoy the historical magnificence that is The Holy Land. If the cockroaches take over, nobody will get to visit anything. My point about Germans and Nazis was this: The people who will decide if there will be a war against Islam is the moderate Muslims, not you and not me. But they must understand that they can be treated the same way other enemies have been treated (or mistreated in the case of the Japanese Internment Camps). They shall decide if they want to be a religion and join Christians and Jews in a civilized society or if they instead elect to favor Sharia Law here in the West and, if so, be treated as the enemy or, at very least, agents of a foreign power (with the need to register as such). In the end, America did not bomb Nazis; America bombed Germany. America did not bomb Japanese Nationalist Militants; America bombed Japan. Germany and Japan are our friends today, now that they understand what we won't put up with. Same for the USSR. And please, you and I both know that the loss of every military misadventure since 1945 has been the result of pussy rules of engagement. LBJ wanted to win the hearts and minds instead of bombing the dams and levies. Truman didn't want to piss of the ChiComs and Russians so he pussy-footed around. MacArthur would have ended that war in a month. Goldwater would have ended the Vietnam war in about three days. To a very sad extent, the U.S. leaders (not the military itself) lost its balls on V-J Day. ISIS? No problem. You don't send in F-16s and F-18s with some precision b.s. bombing of empty buildings in the middle of the night. No, you send in the B-52s dropping ton after ton after ton of shit down on them for a month. The have a good little cry and light a candle for all the good and moderate "civilians" who bought it in that effort. Simply say, "Sorry 'bout that!" and walk away. Lastly, NO MORE VISAS for Christsakes. No tourist visas for Saudi students, tourist visas for ragtops who want to come see the ball drop at Times Square. Want to see some dropped balls? Go watch a cricket match. No more STUDENT visas! OMG, what could be more stupid than giving visas and scholarships to people who learn from us and then use that knowledge against us in Jihad or Chink-hack. Fuck 'em. Let Allah build them an MRI machine.

C'mon guys, can't we all just get along? Now, Mr. Wood, you needn't hold another's political views against him. After all, it's his choice to vote for a monkey and support overseas cockroaches, right? I love the fact that this Audrey person has appointed itself the conscience and morality cop of the peeping-tom discussion board. That's like being the medic at the Christian Science convention. Meanwhile, I would agree with His Impotence and some of its pretentious remarks were my posts in the regular RLC discussion threads. My comments would be trollish and off-topic. Trollish and off-topic hijacking of threads shows disrespect for the Admin, the website, the starter of the thread, and the other people posting to it. That's why this thread is a subset of a subset WAY OFF the normal voyeuristic theme threads, and is designed to be exactly what it is: A place to discuss something besides Alina's fat ass and Ruslan's Asperger's while, at the same time, not hijacking the Couples and Apartments threads. But you see, Sir Soft-One really is the consummate troll. It's not interested in enjoying a joke or two. No, it's trolling the waters looking for a fight. It's all pissed off that its Lord and Savior turned out to be a bumbling fool and traitor. When Iran gets a nuke, this stupid fuck will tell us that it's Bush's fault, right? Or maybe the CIA's fault. Rather than step up and admit that "Yes We Can Made Me Cum," it prefers to skulk about picking fights with others. Nevertheless, I certainly hope it has a super sparkly day!!!! Yo! Miss Audrey, Cupcake. This one's for you. A muslim woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.” Anyway, I'm concerned that some may think that, just because we don't trust Muslims, we are "white supremacists." Nothing could be farther from the truth. It's not that we think white folks are better than others; it's that we can identify who the cockroaches are. The fact that we don't pretend, like Mr. Limper would like us to, that ALL people and ALL ideas are EQUAL, does not suggest that we think our own race is better than all others. We just know that the gutter folks, the beheaders this asshole loves so much, are scum. We don't have to claim to be superior to all others to correctly identify those unworthy to live. They self-identify to everybody except that commie cock sucker who has the nerve to come here and soil my thread, no offense intended.

A Muslim walks into his local mosque with a big grin on his face. "What are you so happy about, Abdul?" Asks the Imam. "Well, I'll tell you," replies Abdul. "I live by the railroad tracks and on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the rails, like in the American movies. I cut her free and took her back to my humble abode. Allah be praised - we made love all night, all around the tent. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position permitted by Mohammed, Peace Be Upon Him!" "By the most Merciful," exclaimed the Imam, "you have been blessed. Was she as beautiful as a desert flower?" Abdul grimaced, " I do not know - I never found her head."

Any and all are fair game. I'll start with this one: A Muslim father is taking a shower with his young son when the son asks, "Dad, when will I have a bigger penis like that?" The dad replies, "When you get older, son." The next day the father was taking a shower with his young daughter when she asked, “Dad, when do I get a big penis like that?" He responds, "As soon as your mother leaves to do the shopping."

Shun them. Don't shop at stores where the clerks wear the terrorist robes.

The whole thing seems pretty fishy in any case.

Perhaps what is needed is a combo plane: A blend of a drone and a wood chipper. Fly over ISIS and send Ebola bodies through the chipper, out into the ever so rosy dawn.

Maybe they will construct a tall obelisk in his honor -- gratitude for helping them return Iraq to the seventh century. It will be known as Obama's Last Erection.

As someone who used to sing the "Flipper" song every time I ate a tuna sandwich, I hake to say it, and I wouldn't want to carp on the subject too long, but I think her entire plan was floundering from the start. I Wanda what she was thinking.

... will they re-name it "Obama City?"

LOL That's a good one. The Human form of Mad Cow Disease. << curtsies graciously >> It's that, or despite her best efforts she just found out she's carrying Paul's child. That would make most any girl cry. Not so bad. She could name it "Game Boy."

Re: WTC. Not only the monkeys dancing about when the towers were hit, I happened to be listening to NPR at the time. There was a call-in segment interrupting the usual all-morning-long jazz sax solo program so people could talk about the events that morning. One "black-sounding" voice after another seemed to delight in "America's chickens comin' home to roooost." I got bored and went downstairs to watch it all on TV with the rest of the world. But caller after caller that morning greeted those events as great news. Then, of course, doing stuff like that became politically incorrect and the whole "united we stand" b.s. machinery cranked in. They were so pleased that "some nasty [beep] come your way for a change...etc." It was clear that, at that point in time, they didn't think of themselves as Americans.

<< blush >>

You and I agree on a variety of observations, but I would knit-pick just a couple: First, I do not consider Islam to be a theocracy even though it may meet some of the simpler prerequisites. Clearly, Islam is not a pure religion, nor is it purely a political movement. It is a hybrid. Until the Unification of Islam comes to pass, there can be no theocracy. There can be b.s. attempts at establishing a caliphate (ISIL for example) but the Sunnis will never be taken seriously by the Shi'ites. To the Shi'ites, the ISIL folks are nut jobs with guns. Unfortunately, the Shi'ites are equally crazy (and I rarely use that term), most due to their eschatology: the end days, the coming of the 12th Imam (the Mahdi) and so on. This end-days philosophy is not dissimilar to that of Christianity (Book of Revelations), etc. Herein lies the important difference: the vast majority of Sunnis can never identify with outfits like ISIL nor with the fairy tale prophecies of the Shia. They are more or less like normal people, but a bit over the top and perpetually adolescent. They live in a cultural world of honor and shame. Nice, eh? Second, a disturbing number of Shi'ites subscribe to Shia eschatology and care little for present day reality when, to their minds, it's all about the hereafter (virgins, loose-moraled goats and camels, etc. -- sorry). More disturbing is that both the Shi'ites and the Sunnis believe that Israel must be destroyed. No, it's not that they hate Jews. They love Jews and want to provide them with everlasting life -- once they have elected to convert (rather than be beheaded). See, their end-of-days scenario can't go into effect, so they believe, so long as Israel is where it is. The Mahdi cannot come out of hiding and begin Judgment Day unless and until Israel is destroyed. It is all spelled out for them in political terms -- physical events -- not in religious terms. The passive Muslims in the U.S., who don't really pay much attention to the Holy Qu'ran essentially are like fair-weather Protestants who didn't listen in Sunday school and just want the social aspect of being in their "religious" group and give their kids some sort of cultural "identity." You know, dress funny, eat funny shit, line up like crickets on the floor. That sort of thing. They have no real understanding of the eschatology and they couldn't care less. Everyday we hear some fool on the TV telling us that "the vast majority of Muslims are peace-loving." We know this how? Hmmmm? We don't. Like the pretender in Washington who says, "Islam is the religion of peace," the part that gets unsaid is the other half of the sentence: "..... that is, once everybody else has been converted or knocked off..." Tee time. Think of Islam as early to mid-20th Century Germany. Think of radical Islam as the Nazis. Okay so far? Not all Germans were Nazis, not all Nazis were German. When we went to war, did we declare war on Nazis? Did we drop bombs on Nazis? No. We went to war against Germany; we bombed Germans. With the help of the USSR, we put enough physical pressure on the Germans that they were forced to abandon the Nazis -- something they were more than ready to do for quite some time at that point anyway. Was Germany a religions? Of course not! Was Nazism a religion? Not exactly. Like radical Islam, it was a hybrid of faux Teutonic mythological make-overs and faux genetic clap-trap on one hand, and a quasi-socialist middle class political movement on the other hand. Just like Islam. Thus, Islam cannot shield itself from direct action by wrapping itself in the robes and rituals of religion. Too much blood under the bridge for that. Just as it was up to the Germans (once the world had its boots on their necks) to reject the Nazi philosophy, so it is up to the so-called moderate Muslims to pull up their big-boy pants and take on the radicals. They will not do that, of course, unless something forces them to step up. What that may be is another discussion. I liked your post a lot. You see these things more clearly than, perhaps, 90% of the people with whom I come into contact every day. Good luck with your range. Where I am, we shoot clay.

I posted this in Juke Box but for some reason I think it might work in the Political Correctness thread as well.

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This is all 100% true! ... If you don't get Fox News.