TBG 150

To fully appreciate this you have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello but then you are probably too old to understand computers. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on... If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their famous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this: COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO : Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. ABBOTT : Mac? COSTELLO : No, the name's Lou . ABBOTT : Your computer? COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. ABBOTT : Mac? COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou . ABBOTT : What about Windows? COSTELLO : Why? Will it get stuffy in here? ABBOTT : Do you want a computer with Windows? COSTELLO : I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows? ABBOTT : Wallpaper. COSTELLO : Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. ABBOTT : Software for Windows? COSTELLO : No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have? ABBOTT : Office. COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? ABBOTT : I just did. COSTELLO : You just did what? ABBOTT : Recommend something. COSTELLO : You recommended something ? ABBOTT : Yes. COSTELLO : For my office? ABBOTT : Yes. COSTELLO : OK, what did you recommend for my office? ABBOTT : Office. COSTELLO : Yes, for my office! ABBOTT : I recommend Office with Windows. COSTELLO : I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? ABBOTT : Word. COSTELLO : What word? ABBOTT : Word in Office. COSTELLO : The only word in office is office. ABBOTT : The Word in Office for Windows. COSTELLO : Which word in office for windows? ABBOTT : The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'. COSTELLO : I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with? ABBOTT: Money. COSTELLO : That's right. What do you have? ABBOTT : Money. COSTELLO : I need money to track my money? ABBOTT : It comes bundled with your computer. COSTELLO : What's bundled with my computer? ABBOTT : Money. COSTELLO : Money comes with my computer? ABBOTT : Yes.. No extra charge. COSTELLO : I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much? ABBOTT : One copy. COSTELLO : Isn't it illegal to copy money? ABBOTT : Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money. COSTELLO : They can give you a license to copy money? ABBOTT : Why not? THEY OWN IT! (A few days later) ABBOTT : Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO : How do I turn my computer off? ABBOTT : Click on 'START'.............

At the rate of erosion, there will be no ocean front LAND left. When I was a kid eons ago, we had to walk 300 yards to get to the water. Now it's maybe 100 feet. The only advantage of this is, the girls have to lay closer together on the little bit of beach left. So you don't need to twist up your neck so much looking around.

It only takes one in a hundred to turn a nice ROI. Especially if they have a high credit score. Then the sale of those numbers goes way up.

If it's mechanical, I can fix it or make the parts to fix it. But damned if I can see inside of a nanochip and fix it.

With all of the free porn on the 'Net, I'm surprised people fall for stuff like that. I thought that you young'uns were tech smart.

Just playin. I rebuilt that box about 4 years ago. No one around here would even touch it or they wanted near $3000. I did the whole thing for under $500 and a lot of sweat.

My wife got a letter in the mail yesterday from the second largest scamming state in the union, Kalifornia. It told her that she had $305.21 in some insurance refund coming to her and they were going to be the ones to be sure that she got it. I looked at it and pointed out the flaws. Improper name spelling, she never had an insurance company by that name, it was a pre-printed letter with a rubber stamp signature, and the pure fact that they didn't even know what city she lived in. We pulled it up on the 'Net. Seems a lot of folks fell for it and were scammed out of personal identity. Into the shredder it went.

And here I am trying to figure out how to re-line the reverse cone of a Dual-Coupling Hydra-Matic Automatic transmission from the 50's.

It's that hot here. Add to that the rain and like numbers of humidity and the girls seem to melt into the pavement..

Lez Voyeur is gonna love that one.

It wasn't me. Why y'all lookin' at me? I din't do nuttin..... ;)

Ya mean I'm not the only one here that thinks that way? 'Magine that. 8)

He/She was just a fleeting persona of another member. If you look it has it's name as a 'Guest', which means that handle/person/persona is no longer valid. That was a female like I have a 12" dick. NOT !!!

One trimmed around the ears and raw for Dth.

Your benefits will begin after your 90 day probationary period, which by the way, doesn't start until you are official as a paid member.

Look at the close up of her tits and white panties now as she covers that bumper. Oh, that's nice.

I can handle the trimmed around the ears part. But I really like them not looking like they pushed a litter of kids through them with half of the insides hanging out. And while some hood ornaments look cool, I don't want it poking my eye out on a 69.

Your welcome. I'm sure I have something for everyone in this pile somewhere. :)

A young boy went up to his father and asked him, 'Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?' The father thought for a moment, then answered, 'Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that.' So the boy went to his mother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' The mother replied, 'Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!' The boy then went to his sister and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' The girl replied, 'Oh my Gawd! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?' The boy then went to his brother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' 'Of course,' the brother replied. 'Do you know what a million bucks would buy?' The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, 'Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?' The boy replied, 'Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars . But 'realistically', we're living with two hookers and a queer.'

A crusty old biker out on a long summer ride in the country pulls up to a tavern in the middle of nowhere, parks his bike and walks inside. As he passes through the swinging doors, he sees a sign hanging over the bar: COLD BEER: $2.00 HAMBURGER: $2.25 CHEESEBURGER: $2.50 CHICKEN SANDWICH : $3.50 HAND JOB: $50.00 Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment, the ole' biker walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled farmers. She glides down behind the bar to the ole biker. "Yes?" she inquires with a wide, knowing smile, "may I help you?" The ole biker leans over the bar, "I was wondering young lady," he whispers, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?" She looks into his eyes with that wide smile and purrs "Why yes, yes, I sure am". The ole' biker leans closer and into her left ear whispers softly, "Well, wash your hands real good, cause I want a cheeseburger".

#1 and #4 will do it for me. No meat curtains, no holes and no jungles.

Yeah, well, Foamy gave a better explanation. So there. And who are you callin' old, you young punk?

And here is what Google did to that. Gentlemen, if at all is 'well that every man might speak in his own language do not see why' to work so hard to write in English. Does that mean I'll talk 'in Italian and see if anyone else is added and maybe we will form a group around Italico. 8)

Touche'. ;D I wasn't thinking of it in that respect. I guess it's all in your mindset when reading.

Oh. Okay. Thanks. Whaddidhesay?