tle

I think this is her long time friend from her hometown...

A man calls Pizza hut to order a pizza... CALLER: Is this Pizza Hut? GOOGLE: No sir, it's Google Pizza. CALLER: I must have dialed a wrong number, sorry. GOOGLE: No sir, Google bought Pizza Hut last month. CALLER: OK. I would like to order a pizza. GOOGLE: Do you want your usual, sir? CALLER: My usual? You know me? GOOGLE: According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust. CALLER: Super! That’s what I’ll have. GOOGLE: May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust? CALLER: What? I don’t want a vegetarian pizza! GOOGLE: Your cholesterol is not good, sir. CALLER: How do you know that? GOOGLE: Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years. CALLER: Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetarian pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol. GOOGLE: Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you purchased only a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once at Lloyds Pharmacy, 4 months ago. CALLER: I bought more from another Pharmacy. GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your credit card statement. CALLER: I paid in cash. GOOGLE: But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement. CALLER: I have other sources of cash. GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your latest tax returns unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law! CALLER: WHAT THE !!! GOOGLE: I'm sorry sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you. CALLER: Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others. I'm going to an island without the internet, TV, where there is no phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me. GOOGLE: I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago...

But in the case of these two it's not such a great mystery. They're both women. They're both tall and slim with long legs. They both love dogs. They're both artistic, in their own way. They're both intellectual, in their own way. They both love pussy. They both love dick. They both have men that give them dick... but not enough... They both love to party a little. They both love to show off their bodies and work for the same company.... It's not really that big of a mystery why they'd be friends...

They're women. They're supposed to be a mystery...

She could rub one out every 15 minutes and still have enough left over to satisfy Alberto...

A ragged, old derelict biker shuffled into a down and dirty bar. Stinking of whiskey and cigarettes, his hands shook as he took the "Piano Player Wanted" sign from the window and handed it to the bartender. "I'd like to apply for the job," he said. "I was an F-4 pilot, flying off carriers back in 'Nam, but when they retired the Phantom all the thrill was gone, and soon they cashed me in as well. I learned to play the piano at O-Club happy hours, so here I am."..The barkeeper wasn't too sure about this doubtful looking old guy, but it had been quite a while since he had a piano player and business was falling off. So, why not give him a try. The seedy old pilot staggered his way over to the piano while several patrons snickered. By the time he was into his third bar of music, every voice was silenced....What followed was a rhapsody of soaring music unlike anything heard in the bar before. When he finished there wasn't a dry eye in the place. The bartender took the old fighter pilot a beer and asked him the name of the song he had just played. It's called "Drop your Skivvies, Baby, I'm Going Balls To The Wall For You" he said. After a long pull from the beer, leaving it empty, he said "I wrote it myself."..The bartender and the crowd winced at the title, but the piano player just went on into a knee-slapping, hand-clapping bit of ragtime that had the place jumping. After he finished, the fighter pilot acknowledged the applause, downed a second proffered mug, and told the crowd the song was called, "Big Boobs Make My Afterburner Light Up", and that he wrote it himself. He then launched into another mesmerizing song and everyone in the room was enthralled. He announced that it was the latest rendition of his song, "Spread 'em Baby, It's Foggy Out Tonight and I Need To See The Centerline", excused himself and headed for the john. When he came out the bartender went over to him and said, "Hey fly-boy, the job is yours, but do you know your fly is open and your pecker is hanging out?" "Know it?" the old fighter pilot replied, "Hell, I wrote it!"

A young Irish girl goes to confession and says, “Bless me Father, for I have sinned. The priest replies, “Go ahead, my child.” “Well”, she says, “Last night I made love to me boyfriend... FIVE TIMES! And it was GLORIOUS, Father. He made me tingle all over, and I swear it was as though I was seein’ the stars in my passion. And, I think I may have wailed like a banshee. More than once. And me legs was all wibbly wobbly, even the next mornin’. But, I know that makin’ love to me boyfriend before marriage is a sin, and I’ve come seekin’ absolution. The priest sits back, rubs his forehead, and looks at the young lass and says, “Right. What I need for you to do is go down to Mr. O’Malley’s market and get four good sized lemons. Go home, cut them in half, and squeeze the juice into a nice tall glass and drink in down straight away.” The girl looks at the priest with a confused look and asks, “ Will that absolve me of me sin, Father?” “No it will not, but it’ll wipe the smile off yer face!”

One day a man decided to retire... He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank. He soon found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts. After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks,” Where did you come from? How did you get here?" She replies, "I rowed over from the other side of the island where I landed when my cruise ship sank." "Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you." "Oh, this thing?" explains the woman.” I made the boat out of some raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm tree branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree." "But, where did you get the tools?" "Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron and I used that to make tools and used the tools to make the hardware." The guy is stunned. "Let's row over to my place," she says "and I'll give you a tour." So, after a short time of rowing, she soon docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a long stone walk leading to a cabin and tree house. While the woman ties up the row boat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Please sit down." "Would you like a drink?" "No! No thank you," the man blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another drop of coconut juice." "Oh it's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you like a Tropical Spritz?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they exchange their individual survival stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There's a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs." No longer questioning anything, the man goes upstairs into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What's next?" When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but some small flowers on tiny vines, each strategically positioned, she smelled faintly of gardenias. She then beckons for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've both been out here for many months. You must have been lonely. When was the last time you played around? She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing.” You mean..." he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes, ! ! ! "You've built a Golf Course too!!!!

Amira's gone? I hadn't missed her...

We never see any of the other girls just sitting down and reading a book.

That sounds like a couple of different apartments... Well, one of them doesn't even have any nudism....

I wonder how much cum Svetlana has cleaned up?

They need a new sofa and TV... I'm sure they'd love a nicer bigger kitchen but at least they do have a guest room which most of the couples apartments do not have... The camera angles in almost all the apartments suck...

Yes, but can Holly cook?

The temperature isn't consistent with Rome, Prague or Barcelona's current temperature...

Now is says 70F...

Balcony shows temperature is 32F... Where is this apartment?

Ass looks fine to me...

Man reaches the Pearly Gates and Saint Peter asks, “Have you ever helped anyone, given to charity or worked in a soup line?”. Man says, “Well, I stopped at a restaurant one time when traveling through the Black Hills. There were a bunch of rough mean biker dudes giving this old lady a hard time. So, I told myself I should come to her aid. I decided to find the biggest, baddest biker with the most tattoos and piercings. I walked up to him straight away and punched him with all I had right on his left jaw. I then ripped his nose ring out and threw it on the ground and said, “If you want to fight someone I’m here to accommodate you! You need to leave the lady alone!”” Saint Peter says, “Wow! When was this?” Man says, “About 5 minutes ago”

We all believe what we see. The problem is that each of us interpret what we see in different ways. And what happens off camera none of us see.

How exactly would you go about proving that?

The landing strip appears to have been neglected while she was away. Taking care of that now.

Not much of a tan but I do detect tan lines.

She might have taken a vacation to Croatia. She might have taken a vacation somewhere else. She might be working a summer job. One thing we know for sure is that Candela didn’t come look after Taco and Alberto.

And that freed up Candela to do other things. Like maybe take a vacation.