TBG 150

SMART ASS One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off! Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up. Remember the five simple rules to be happy: Free your heart from hatred - Forgive. Free your mind from worries - Most never happen. Live simply and appreciate what you have. Give more ; Expect less. NOW .... Enough of that crap . . . The donkey later came back, and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock. MORAL OF TODAY'S LESSON: When you do something wrong, and try to cover your ass, it always comes back to bite you .

Saturday morning the weather was too bad to play golf. I was bored with nothing to do. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. I opened it to find a young, well dressed man standing there who said: "Hello sir, I'm a Jehovah's Witness." So I said, "Come in and sit down." I offered him a fresh cup of coffee and asked, "What do you want to talk about?" He said, "Beats the hell out of me. Nobody's ever let me in before."

A group of American tourists stopped at a pub in Cork. One of the Americans said, in a loud voice, "I hear you Irish think your great drinkers. I bet 5,000 euros that no-one here can drink 30 pints of Guinness in 30 minutes." The bar was silent, the American noticed one Irishman leaving, no-one took up the bet. 40 minutes later the Irishman who left returned and said "Hey Yank, is your wee bet still on?" "Sure" said the American, "30 pints in 30 minutes for a bet of 5,000 euros." "Grand, " replied the Irishman, "so pour the pints and start the clock." It was very close but the last drop was consumed with 2 seconds to spare. "OK Yank, pay up." said the Irishman.. "I'm happy to pay, here's your money" said the American. "But tell me, when I first offered the wager I saw you leave. Where did you go?' The Irishman replied, "Well sir, 5,000 euros is a lot of money to a man like me, so I went to the pub across the road to see if I could do it.

I think that RB50 is the only good newbie out of at least the last thousand or so. Good posts, writes in English, knows how to put together complete sentences and damn, I'm just amazed.

What were really expecting?

Thank you for the explanation. I do remember the 'doodles' when I did have Google as my search page. Happy belated to you. 29 and holding, right? ;)

This lot is further out there than The Twilight Zone. They're so far out they may never be able to come back.

Jim Morrison said it best way back when.... "People are Strange..."

Maybe they follow strict Christian or Catholic values. Myself, I like to test drive my favorite model before I buy it.

They do the same for our football sports-holes too. They idolize these brain dead idiots

I hate quoting, but there aren't 50 pictures in the quote. What do you mean it changes? I use Bing, not Google, so fill us noobs in please.

That was a beautiful story. It made my day. Thanks.

Then what's the point? If they can't fry his ass, why bother to choose a partial jury.

Stupid bitch.

Wait'll you pass 50. :'( At 60, you won't even care anymore. You will just be happy to piss from it.

I wouldn't trust ANYONE in the Government. Rep, Dem or Lib.

What couch?

I'll be back. Let me finish eating so that I can type with 2 fingers and not 1. Is there enough bandwidth available? I mean for me. Piss on the others.

And lately, that's all that this board has turned into. One big argument. How about the shit stops, huh?

You just to stick Florida in there, didn't you? Like we don't have enough problems here.

Mine either. The feet are an added bonus. It all looks good to me.

Sorry San Per. I can't move it because of the title. Only Admin can. You do it. Anyone can. Lazy ass Yo. "You tahkin' ta me?

I won't go as far as expert, but I know what looks good to me. :)

You do it. Anyone can.

There. Are you happy now? All of the pix that made you have to scroll around the screen and all of the fuckwits that have to quote them are gone. Now you can bitch, whine, cry and complain because you have no pictures to look at. Fucking Romper Room at it finest.