Jonno

You can make a water-bed more bouncy by using spring water. To this day, the boy that use to bully me at school still takes my lunch money. On the plus side, he makes great Subway sandwiches. My wife gave birth 4 times and still fits in her prom dress from high school. I gave birth 0 and I don't fit in my pants from December.

Better luck next time. 🙂

Funny, yet disturbing. 🤣

Why change the habit of a lifetime. Can't have much brain left. 🤣 Picking away at it. 😂

True. If cheap but still looks good. Not so bad when it's ripped off you. 🤣

Always good seeing a woman in sexy lingerie.

Harley great view. Nice socks. 🤣

My therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them. I did that and I feel much better but I'm wondering.... do I keep the letters? I hate girls that complain about being single every 3 minutes. 90% of my socks are single & you don't see them crying about it.

She sucks Paul’s cock. 🤣

Two ADV riders camping out in a tent. One of them crawls out to pee before bed. Comes back all wet. The other rider asks if it's rainy outside. "No- it's windy!" The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I'd like to masturbate in the cup. I said, "Well, I'm pretty good, but I don't think I'm ready to compete just yet."

Life is like toilet paper, you're either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole. Did you know that if you hold your ear up to a strangers leg you can actually hear them say, "what the fuck are you doing".

That a new position she's in. 🤣

Stolen from the local garage 🤣. A performing blowjob with ass pointed to the camera. 🤣

Çlear to see Octavia plays up to the cameras. Definitely a sandwich short of a picnic. 😂

Tonya 🤣

What's the best part about Valentine's Day? The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale. What's the difference between a £20 steak and a £40 steak? February 14th.

My driving instructor told me to pull over somewhere safe. After 10 minutes he asked why I hadn't pulled over. I said we are still in Manchester. I bought a box of condoms earlier today. The cashier asked if I'd like a bag. I said, ",nah, I'll just turn the lights off."

Amalia giving Mr.Pink a ride in the shower. Shame it wasn't longer.

My girlfriend said, "you act like a detective too much. I want to split up." "Good idea," I replied. "We can cover more ground that way." Top causes of Divorce. 4. Finances 3. Infidelity 2. Lack of intimacy 1. Thermostat Wars

Grandma's been staring through the window ever since it started snowing. If it gets any worse I'll have to let her in. My wife likes it when I blow air on her when she's hot, but honestly... I'm not a fan. How do I disable the autocorrect function on my wife?

What happens when it's all about putting on a show. Dragging it out to the stage where looks like even they are bored. Violet and Jeff were good to watch.

I got lost in your eyes. But I also get lost in most department stores, so I would'nt read too much into it. My first job was being a Diesel fitter at a pantyhose factory. As they came off the line, I would hold them up and say, "yeah, Deez-el fit her."

My mum use to say "40 is the new 30". Lovely woman... Banned from driving. My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that..