Aussie_oi_oi

Joke of the day 😉 An old Doberman starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a lion heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch. The old Doberman thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now! Noticing some bones on the ground nearby, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the lion is about to leap, the old Doberman exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious lion! I wonder if there are any more around here? Hearing this, the young lion halts his attack in mid-stride, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!," says the lion, "That was close! That old Doberman nearly had me! Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the lion. So, off he goes. The squirrel soon catches up with the lion, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the lion. The young lion is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine! Now, the old Doberman sees the lion coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old Doberman says.. "Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another lion! Moral of this story Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery! Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.

Joke of the day 😉 Five Aussie surgeons from big cities are discussing what type of person makes the best patient to operate on. The first surgeon, from Brisbane, says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second, from Perth, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded." The third surgeon, from Adelaide, says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon, from Sydney chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.' But the fifth surgeon, from Melbourne, 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus, the head and the arse are interchangeable.

Cheers Pete

Leora still time for 'sexy time'

OMG, Leora has to buy a pair of those beauties.

Excellent pulo

Aussie loves the beautiful ass of Leora with it in her.

Damn it, hoping the butt plug was getting a run.

Those lucky panties..

mmm, time the green butt plug to make a visit.

Damn, I feel for Leora the wet blanket Paul is hanging around filling his face with Melon.

Joke of the day 😉 A father came home from a long business trip to find his young son riding a brand-new bike. "Where did you get the money for that?" he asked. "It must have cost over 300 dollars!" "I earned it hiking," replied the boy. "Hiking??? Come on son; tell your Dad the truth. Nobody can make that sort of money hiking. Where did you really get the cash from?" "It's like I say, Dad. Every night when you were gone, Mr Goldberg from the bank would come over to see Mom. He'd give me a 20-dollar bill and tell me to take a hike!" 😉

Joke of the day 😉 DON'T DESPAIR Sister Rita was sitting by her convent window one evening when she opened a letter from home: inside the letter was a $100 note from her parents. Sister Rita smiled but as she continued to read the letter by what was left of the last glimmers of daylight coming through her window, she noticed a shabbily dressed stranger leaning against a lamppost in the street below. Quickly she took a piece of paper and wrote, "Don't despair - Sister Rita". She then wrapped the $100 note in it and having got the man's attention, she tossed the wrapped note out of the window to him. The stranger picked it up and read what was on the paper. He looked up, tipped his hat and slowly made his way down the street and into the darkness. Meanwhile, Sister Rita returned to her letter hoping he would use the money wisely. The following day, Sister Rita was told that there was a man at the main door of the convent insisting that he should see her, so she made her way down the stairs to see what the commotion was all about. True enough, she found the stranger, who she had last seen standing in the street, waiting for her. Without a word, he handed her an envelope stuffed full of $100 notes. "What's this?" she asked. "It's your winnings Sister," he replied, "Don't Despair came in at 80-to-1." 😉

Joke of the day 😉 An eight-year-old girl went to the office with her father on "Take Your Kid to Work Day." As they were walking around the office, the young girl started crying and getting very cranky. Her father asked what was wrong with her. As the staff gathered around, she sobbed loudly: "Daddy, where are all the clowns that you said you worked with?" 😉

Joke of the day 😉 There were three horny dogs (A British bulldog, A German shepherd and a Chihuahua) A poodle walked by and she says "I'll let one of you have your way with me if you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence" The Bulldog says "I hate liver and cheese" She says "Nope that won't work" The German shepherd says "I love liver and cheese" She says "Nope that won't work" The Chihuahua says "Liver alone cheese mine" 😉

Joke of the day 😉 An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one-question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics: The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist." Fingers flew, erasers erased, and notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute. Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have got an A when he had barely written anything at all. His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?" 🤣

Joke of the day 😉 John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!" That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night." She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?" John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife." "Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said. The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary." She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."

Joke of the day 😉 This limousine was taking the beautiful, raven-haired model to the airport. Halfway there, the front tire went flat. The model said, "Driver, I don't have time to wait for road service. Can you change it yourself?" The driver said, "Sure." He got out of the car and proceeded to change the tire, but couldn't get the wheel cover off. The model saw him struggling and asked, "Do you want a screwdriver?" He said "Sure! But, first I have to change this tire." 😉

Joke of the day 😉 Tom Lato was shocked to see his beautiful divorced neighbour knocking on his door one Friday evening. He Answered The Door With A Big Smile And said how are you this evening, And what's on your mind!!!! She replies, "I'm so horny that I can't stand it." "I want to go out, get drunk and get laid. Are you free tonight?". "Yes!!!!" he replied enthusiastically. "Wonderful," she said. "Would you watch my kids?" 😉

That damn Guerilla glue has given me grief over the years.

Honestly, I couldn't be more impressed with Leora. Is there a better sight with Leora in the doggy position with her new butt plug in her beautiful ass? Leora has stepped it up and is providing new sexy content and I am happy for her.

I was thinking Leora could insert her green butt plug while in the apartment and Paul wouldn't know.... hehe but we would. 🤠

Wonderful sexy bating with the new butt plug. Thank you Leora xxx

Congrat's Leora on the new butt plug. The butt plug colour looks amazing in you.

https://youtu.be/vRmr6Or6YTE