ddhm Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 24 minutes ago, Pepe said: There's a difference between negative comments and disparaging comments when it comes to caring. I think when you know and trust your friends , you can understand how the comments appear to be , either negative or disparaging . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ddhm Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 13 minutes ago, Slipper Guyquad said: Yep, a massive difference between say "What an idiotic thing to do" and "Please don't do this to yourself" Not that the first thing HAS been said, but you know what i mean as an example. Things at times do have to be said, despite how much it can hurt or upset both the person involved and the person who cares saying it. Exactly as you describe . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ddhm Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 8 minutes ago, Pepe said: That is not what she needs. She needs to distance herself from him completely and move on. How can she distance with him if she needs to phone him every single day ? How can she moves on when and after a quarrel with her current story she would phone him ? And at the end , is this what Leora needs or what we think it is the right thing for her ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pepe Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 Just now, ddhm said: How can she distance with him if she needs to phone him every single day ? How can she moves on when and after a quarrel with her current story she would phone him ? And at the end , is this what Leora needs or what we think it is the right thing for her ? It's not what she needs. She moved to Prague to start a new life. She keeps returning to what was comfortable instead of putting on her BIG girl panties and moving on. If she was to go back to what is comfortable she would be settling instead of moving on. I don't think that is what's going to make her happy. I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I have the life experience to back it up. Going back is only going to make her have regrets it will never be the same as it once was. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Slipper Guyquad Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 Today, especially tonight, our little community, for want of a better phrase, has for once been united. Everyone is on the same page, but thanks to what is clearly a horrible situation. Nothing to do with her and Paul, or her and Malia, but about her and the 'Other' person in her life. No speculation, no hearsay, no conjecture, it has been right there in front of us all on camera - Blimey, you can even watch it all again on replay if you so wish. And it's been something that has united us all, yet something that should never have happened. It should have never got to this stage. The writing was on the wall weeks ago. Yet it has continued to fester so what happened over the last 24 hours had the chance to happen. Why it ever got to this stage, only 2 people know, but it has. But what unfolded was about as bad as it gets, and i thought it was bad enough before, when this kind of thing was there on camera in the past. To see this woman, our Leora, the Goddess as some call her, the 'Hendrix' of RLC, to lose it completely twice in less than 24 hours, to the point where i genuinely got scared for her wellbeing tonight, to the point where she threw her phone on the floor with such venom during it that she has broken the screen....was all we needed to see and hear. She has found herself in a situation that is not only unhealthy, but has been allowed to get this far. And who knows, it may even still continue..... All we can do is display our feelings, our worry and our support - But that can only go on so long. And you can only offer so much love and care, before the person in question has to take control of their own life. And if they continue to make the same mistake over and over, well, that's their own fault. We continue to be sympathetic, show love and of course, views, but only Leora herself can sort her own life out. And she is intelligent enough to do so. Whether she does is entirely a different story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimbo4 Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 2 hours ago, ddhm said: Leora should listen to no one and just do whatever she thinks it is the right for her , even if it proves to be wrong . The decisions should be taken by her and not by affecting opinions of people who are here . Leora should always do whatever she wants . She will always do whatever she wants, she takes no advice of this forum, we have seen an example of her sorting out her own life....not pleasant is it? People who like her don't like to see her distraught but she can only to an extent lay the blame at her own feet. Most people would I guess see her as a victim here, but because we have not seen her guy we are not privy to what goes on between them, therefor it could well be that he is the victim and she is getting no less than she deserves. It was always easy to see and blame Paul to an extent, but we are in the dark here and only know what she wants us to know. 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ddhm Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 6 minutes ago, Pepe said: It's not what she needs. She moved to Prague to start a new life. She keeps returning to what was comfortable instead of putting on her BIG girl panties and moving on. If she was to go back to what is comfortable she would be settling instead of moving on. I don't think that is what's going to make her happy. I don't pretend to have all the answers, but I have the life experience to back it up. Going back is only going to make her have regrets it will never be the same as it once was. I totally agree , I also said that it would only be temporarily relief and just calming down . Again , jimbo4 described it for me the best today . I will make one more comment , no matter how hard it will sound . If Leora wants to have this new life she should adjust to the european way of life and not to the life she had in Russia . The more she delays it , the more she will not finding peace , quiet and relaxation . She needs to expand her social life , she needs to make this apartment a truly place to feel like home . She needs to live for herself according to standards and way of life that happen in Europe . Her personality will stay intact but she needs to embrace the life happening here in Europe . Perhaps European forum members can understand better what I am trying to say , no offense to the Americans of course 😌😇 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimbo4 Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 30 minutes ago, Pepe said: That is not what she needs. She needs to distance herself from him completely and move on. But my smelly friend .....That is easier said than done...we both know that.... 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Slipper Guyquad Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 Just now, jimbo4 said: But my smelly friend .....That is easier said than done...we both know that.... And does she want that? THAT is what is important, what SHE wants. What's in HER heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ddhm Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 5 minutes ago, jimbo4 said: She will always do whatever she wants, she takes no advice of this forum, we have seen an example of her sorting out her own life....not pleasant is it? People who like her don't like to see her distraught but she can only to an extent lay the blame at her own feet. Most people would I guess see her as a victim here, but because we have not seen her guy we are not privy to what goes on between them, therefor it could well be that he is the victim and she is getting no less than she deserves. It was always easy to see and blame Paul to an extent, but we are in the dark here and only know what she wants us to know. I can’t agree less , you are the English master of words , had I English as native language , I hope and wish to describe it that well like you 😊 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ddhm Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 12 minutes ago, Slipper Guyquad said: Today, especially tonight, our little community, for want of a better phrase, has for once been united. Everyone is on the same page, but thanks to what is clearly a horrible situation. Nothing to do with her and Paul, or her and Malia, but about her and the 'Other' person in her life. No speculation, no hearsay, no conjecture, it has been right there in front of us all on camera - Blimey, you can even watch it all again on replay if you so wish. And it's been something that has united us all, yet something that should never have happened. Because it should have never got to this stage. The writing was on the wall weeks ago. Yet it has continued to fester so what happened over the last 24 hours had the chance to happen. Why it ever got to this stage, only 2 people know, but it has. But what unfolded was about as bad as it gets, and i thought it was bad enough before, when this kind of this was there on camera in the past. To see this woman, our Leora, the Goddess as some call her, the 'Hendrix' of RLC, to lose it completely twice in less than 24 hours, to the point where i genuinely got scared for her wellbeing tonight, was all we needed to see and hear. She has found herself in a situation that is not only unhealthy, but has been allowed to get this far. And who knows, it may even still continue..... All we can do is display our feelings, our worry and our support - But that can only go on so long. And you can only offer so much love and care, before the person in question has to take control of their own life. And if they continue to make the same mistake over and over, well, that's their own fault. We continue to be sympathetic, show love and of course, views, but only Leora herself can sort her own life out. And she is intelligent enough to do so. Whether she does is entirely a different story. Excellent said 😊 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pepe Posted November 20, 2020 Share Posted November 20, 2020 4 minutes ago, jimbo4 said: But my smelly friend .....That is easier said than done...we both know that.... Yes I agree with you. She's going to have to make the final decision in what ever she does. As you said there are other people who could advise her with real life experiences if she wasn't so stubborn. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts